SUNDAY, 12/4/11, Issue 5
Crash landing: I am writing to you because I am deeply concerned about a prominent local citizen. Tony Sleiman, a Jaxonpool real estate mogul and co-chairman of Herman Cain’s Deleónsylvania campaign, responded to Herman Cain dropping out of the presidential race by saying that he would update the rock muzak that blares incessantly at the Landing.
Responding to a question from Time-Union reporter Matt Dixon about the crash landing of the Cain campaign, he said, “I was out in the woods . . . . I did not even see it [coming]. What happened?”
Sleiman is a major Jaxonpool developer, and the Jaxonpool Landing is the jewel in the crown of his real estate empire. He and I are members of The Only Party There Is. Together, we have our finger on the nation’s pulse. We know where the nation is heading.
Over the years, Sleiman has tried to make The Landing the coolest place in Jaxonpool. One thing he did to make it a cool place was to bring Herman Cain there for a candidate rally.
Hmmm. This video of the Cain rally isn’t working anymore. Wonder why.
“That ‘high-tech lynching’ thing wasn’t working out for us,” Sleiman is believed to have thought. In response, he is going to take Iron Butterfly’s 1968 hit, “In-A- Gadda-Da-Vida,” off the endless loop that plays over the Landing’s speaker system morning, noon, and night, over and over and over:
“It was getting a little repetitive,” he allegedly admitted. Telling Dixon that “some things take priority,” he intends to devote his efforts to updating the music. “We gotta stay up with the times,” he is understood to have said, stressing that it is important that the Jaxonpool Landing attract more of the younger generation. To replace the Iron Butterfly mainstay to play morning, noon, and night, over and over and over, “I passed over something from Deep Purple and am trying to decide between Steve Miller Band’s ‘Abracadabra’ and Aerosmith’s ‘Angel.’”
Sleiman also indicated he may switch his loyalty from Cain to Newt Gingrich. He didn’t mention Sir Mitt Romulus.
“Always want to be up to date,” says Sleiman.
Scraping the “Honkies for Herman” sticker off the bumper — he and I both!
But taking “In-A- Gadda-Da-Vida” off the Landing’s eternal loop: doesn’t Sleiman’s behavior seem a little concerning? Or am I just overreacting, as usual?
August’s List: Recently published music videos, edited by Farinelli. Watch & listen