WEDNESDAY, 8/14/13, Issue 178
My ideas are so brilliant, you should have to pay to read my letters. This one is about taxes.
Taxes go toward making a city a more civilized place. Higher taxes are associated with more desirable places to live. And the more desirable the place to live, the more expensive its homes become. That’s not fair to renters like me.
Only an idiot would deny this equation: low city taxes = low home values.
Tomorrow morning (Thursday), the City Council’s Finance Committee meets. They will be voting on whether to fund such city services as the Balis Community Center in San Marco and six libraries spread around the city (Maxville, Brentwood, San Marco, Willowbranch, University Park, and Beaches).
People claim that if the Balis Center and library are shut, local middle school students will lose a safe place to go after school and that the vacant building and playground will contribute to neighborhood deterioration.
But they miss the point. As a perennial renter, my only hope of ever buying a home in Jaxonpool is for the city to deteriorate. Once things go down hill, so do property values. Make the city unpleasant enough, and affluent people will flee south to St. Johns County. After they’ve gone, the people like me—the smart ones with brilliant ideas who are renting—will be able to afford houses that once were far out of our price range, maybe even the ones on the river.
That’s why I oppose taxes. In the long run, they help make the city a nice, civilized place to live. Then people want to live here. And that’s the problem. But with fewer police officers and fire fighters, fewer libraries, less road repair, fewer cultural events, longer and longer response times for 911 calls, the city will descend into a “state of nature”—like Detroit. Then people leave, and the city becomes affordable for people like me. If cheap property is all you’re after, as it is for me, things can never descend too far:
In Mad Max’s world, property is cheap
So, I advise everyone reading this piece to contact the members of the Finance Committee and say NO! to the Balis Center and public libraries:
- Greg Anderson, Chair (GAnderson@coj.net)
- Stephen Joost, Vice Chair (Joost@coj.net)
- Reginald Brown (RBown@coj.net)
- Robin Lumb (RLumb@coj.net)
- Richard Clark (RClark@coj.net)
- Matt Schellenberg (MattS@coj.net)
- Clay Yarborough (Clay@coj.net)
- Dr. Johnny Gaffney (Gaffney@coj.net)
- John Crescembeni (JRC@coj.net)
Tell them to stop spending our hard-earned tax dollars and to shut down as many city services as possible. Tell them you’re fighting for lower property values. Tell them you’re doing it for Lemmie Blogiver, so he can buy a house.
Stay tuned: next week I’ll have another brilliant idea about how the city can save money by turning the St. Johns River into an open sewer.
August’s List: Recently published music videos, edited by Farinelli. Watch & listen